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Archive for the ‘Atlanta’ Category

Meet Cissy

In Atlanta, black blogger, Novels on April 5, 2017 at 4:33 am

Chapter One

Meet Cissy

They called her Cissy. Her real name was Cecilia but she ended up with being called Cissy because as a child she was so naturally happy and a joy to be around. She loved to laugh and her mom would say oh Cecilia you are so silly and as a two year old she would go ce ce ce silly. So her mom instead of calling her Silly which she wanted to called her Cissy. Mom was tempted to call her Silly but she kept having nightmares of people hearing her call Cecelia silly and thinking she was retarded so she settled on Cissy.

Cissy was not just a joy to be around. Her whole name was Cecelia Cherie (because she was conceived in Paris) X . Mom like Malcom X not because of Malcolm X changed her name and convinced her future husband to change his last name to X. So all of their birth certificates said X, the marriage license said X and any other document saying otherwise had a big X over it. Everyone’s Drivers license had the last name of X. Mom’s reasoning was I’ve done the research into slavery and when you look at the records black people are listed like animals, the slave record states they are slaves and lists first names only. Therefore since I list black on my vital records our last name is X. Never mind that the last thing anyone would call anybody in their family was black. They were viewed as some off form of Latin American which they were not.

It’s important to note that mom was color struck. Just like her grandmother she was color struck. Mom witnessed her grandmother being berated by a friend saying you are so color struck. It’s true Mom’s Granny’s husband was a black man that looked white.  Mom’s husband did not look white but as she’d like to say he was Gold and her nick name for him was Goldie. Mom would always reiterate that in a restaurant Goldie walked up to her and asked for her number.  She said of course she gave up her number because he was 6 feet 2 looked 180 and a law student at a very prestigious college but as she tells it she could have cared less about his credentials. You did not have to have an education for mom just be educated and able to carry on an intellectual conversation to impress her.  In any event just like her mom she liked tall men her dad was six foot two but brown. Mom would always say who ever said if you’re brown stick around did not know my dad, but he was good for child support and Alimony.

Mom would embarrassingly tell anyone that up to dad she preferred men of her exact color that carried the patina of black and native American but as she lay in bed with him the second night they met his skin glistening gold and her satiated by the blessing between his legs her kind immediately became that man 6’2 180 and Gold…….. She never looked back. Truthfully dad was interracial. It was not mentioned because their last name was X. It was also not mentioned because it did not fit the narrative of their life bla bla blacks who made it. They loved their white grandmother but Cissy did not know she was white until she was going through boxes in her grandmother’s house and saw a birth certificate. She never mentioned it just made note that the whole damn family was cracrazy. Everyone was walking around a hybrid of something acting radically black and her dad’s mother was not even black but white and the strange thing about that was her dad’s mom looked like her mom’s mom who was definitely black.

Mom told Dad numerous times prior to their marriage I’m going to trap you and marry you. She said he would laugh and say go ahead.  When Dad graduated from Law School and got his first job, a big money job mom and dad took a vacation to Paris and mom stopped using birth control. Cissy was conceived and mom and dad walked down the aisle pregnant. Mom made the decision to get married and they did. The conversation between the two was she said, I’m pregnant. He said when do you want to get married?  They were married after the waiting period for the license which was two days. Nine months later there was the fun, brilliant and beautiful Cissy.  West Coast Bay Area Cissy all the way.

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Law Suit Update Case Dropped I got the Dates Mixed Up (also general update)

In Afrian American Twitters, African American Bloggers, African American Blogs, Atlanta, black blogger, black twitters, Black Women Bloggers, culture, Dekalb County, ethnic twitters on July 19, 2010 at 5:19 am

An important court date was set two weeks after my father died and I got the dates mixed up.  As a result of my non attendance at this very important court date my case was thrown out.  While I was tempted to appeal and reopen the case.  The practice of law even as Pro-SE is an extremely draining experience and combined with attorneys who represent clients who tell any sort of lie like the folks at Vision Works it becomes shocking.  Some attorneys are literally gum on the bottom of a shoe.

As for me personally I am still afraid of stores in the Dekalb county area.  While with my dad I spent time in the Greensboro southern Virginia area and I could literally breathe loved the people loved the quality of the products and had a generally pleasant time in these two areas.   As I return to Georgia the old feelings of fear and trepidation have returned I think I heard an Employee in Kroger saying extremely derogatory things about me to a customer, I went into Quiznos in Lithonia  and was given a rotten salad.  As for Quiznos I have not figured out if it was deliberate or if they really give people rotten salads, furthermore this was my second visit in a week and the second time they overcharged me can they really be that dumb to overcharge me twice.  I returned from Virginia because of a stop sign case I spoke with the solicitor general for Dekalb and agreed to take a defensive driving course, However would you believe I was placed on probation for a stop sign violation, its not even a misdemeanor, its an ordinance and I will have to pay forty dollars for the pleasure of being on probation.  WELCOME BACK TO DEKALB COUNTY GEORGIA THE HOME OF FEAR FOR ME

Complaint Against Evansdale Elementary Dekalb County Schools Obama Admin refused to Investigate

In Afrian American Twitters, African American Bloggers, African American Blogs, african american twitters, Atlanta, barack obama, black blogger, black bloggers, black twitters, Black Women Bloggers, ethnic twitters, Neighborhoods, politics, presidential race, Race, Race and Class, relationships on December 25, 2009 at 8:47 am

During the campaign I wrote about public housing residents  in Chicago who were in the freezing cold in Barack Obama’s district.   They insisted they called his office and he did nothing about it.  He claimed no knowledge of it .  THe Chicago public schools when Obama was a politician were in a shambles and still are in a shambles Aas evidenced by the many killings near and around the schools.  The strangest thing to me though is that Obama is now trying to craft a health care plan when he apparently does not care for anyone not even third term babies that he freely supported aborting.  Personally I think he seeks to destabilize health care so his friends can have some money.  What ahve the stimulus funds done.  In any event this is about my complaint my civil rights complaint that I made to the Department of Education regarding the education of my child who was not being educated and seemed to be under emotional and psychological attack at this school.  As in character the Obama administration did nothing about it and declined to investigate.   I think there were some real problems in the county school system and no one seems to care about these children.  There is a virtual academy in our state where a huge number of particpants are from the county of Dekalb County Georgia.  The system is just different and not held accountable for teaching the children.  They have been embroiled in a cheating scandal and the superintendent sent out an email saying to support the teachers and principals involved, I wonder why.  As a parent I don’t want anyone cheating for my children there is a life other than elementary and high school and they will be hrld accountable.

In any event here is my incoherent complaint to the Obama administration’s DOE  they refused to investigate.
This is a class complaint on the behalf of all of the poor minority children who have been victimized by this school

As I was registering my child for Evansdale Elementary I noticed that a lady was angrily withdrawing her child from the school.  She was a black woman and appeared to be extremely angry as she was withdrawing the child. I thought to myself how strange my child will be OK because she was a straight A student and on the honor roll all of her life.I forgot to mention I tried to enroll my child but told my child was not on the list and then a call as made to the board of education to confirm that my child was on the list. I thought it was strange that someone would think I would drive all of that way to lie about my child being on the list but continued to register her though I was slightly disturbed.  On the day of open house as I entered the building to meet the teacher a Jewish looking lady said Oh no you are not on the list and refused to allow us to precede to the normal place where people who have registered go to and directed us to the library where an Asian woman and Hispanic woman were standing saying they were on the list for the school also.  I overheard the women say if you were registered your folder would be here to the Asian woman.  I said well I preregistered and my information should be there the women from the school kept saying they could not find the name until they eventually found it and then they said oh it was in the bin all the time you’ve preregistered and directed me to the teachers room and never directed me to the cafeteria where stuff such as PTA registration was happening etc.  As I was leaving I overheard a parent say to her child no more advanced classes for you you cant handle it.  I do not know of these persons names but I do know the school board keeps a record of all students who are disenrolled from the school and if you speak to them you probably will find commonility in what I’m saying to you.

The allegations of discrimination come from what I can only describe as emotional cruelty towards a child which is designed to mess with her confidence.  My child made a 34 on a multiplication quiz that was unannounced and was forced to write it in her agenda several times.  Instead of sending the quiz home and allowing me to say you’ve got to do better the children were forced to write it several times however when she made a 92 and 90 on the same material she did not have to write it to reinforce that she had done well on her test.  My daughter than took another test and wore her glasses to school but they disappeared she does not know when.  However the teacher wrote on her grade of 80 test where are your glasses?  I found this profoundly disturbing and wrote to the principal and faxed a copy of this information he told me to discuss it with the teacher. The school has a weird system of recording work habits fro all children which is really strange they get checks when they don’t have certain items like a book.  This is OK but my daughter left her book at home and instead of the teacher allowing her to share with someone else or giving her a sheet to look at she made her sit there without a book and emailed me she did not have her book, the email was fine but to sit there and not let the child have a book or anything to look at is disgraceful and unheard of. Prior to this I had come in to speak to two of my children’s subject matter teachers one concerning the math and another because he had misgraded my child’s paper, she had gotten an 80 when she deserved a 100.  This also happened in my chidls workbook I noticed that all of her answers were correct but she self grded her paper and marked them wrong, yesterday I said honey these answers are correct she said my teacher looked at these answers and said they were wrong.  I insisted they were correct.
In any event on the day I went to see the math teacher and the science teacher about my various issues concerning them I did not see the Social Studies teacher because I had not received ANY graded papers from her “NOTHING”  well when I got home I received a call from her telling me my child had been late for two days which she had and that it may jeopardize her grade, the teacher even admits that this was the third day she had done actual work with the students THE THIRD DAY IN THREE WEEKS AND NOT ONE GRADED PAPER, I eventually called her back and she told me she had given my child many checks I said no youh ave not she does not have one check she then called for my daughter out of her class I said I hope you are not putting checks on her paper now SHE CALLED THE CHILD OUT OF CLASS and she had one check when she got home but we could not maintain a civil conversation I told her my daughter had been late to school but not as late as she was indicating I said maybe she got lost since it was a new school she said your child is not smart enough to find her way through the school after being in school for three weeks I then discontinued the conversation and made an appointment to speak with the Principal who despite the fact that I had written him a long letter of my concerns addressed none of them. Our topic of conversation was that I was aware that there was a gpa requirement for staying in the school and it appeared they were picking on my child this was not resolved. The next day coincidentally  the children were sent forms home and parents had to sign they were aware of the gpa requirements I found the timing strange.  In addition the children were given reading tests to see what level they were on which seems strange timing to me also.  The last action was an email about forgetting the book which I wrote about above. While these maybe normal incidents and coincidences I am convinced that this is a pattern of behavior that certain children have been subjected to.  My child was torn down before she got in the door and her confidence is going and gone she makes careless mistakes on her math work because of the emotional cruelty that she is subjected to.   This should not happen to any other child.

As far as age discrimination is involved the school is using strategies that are not age appropriate the kids are changing classes at fourth grade they have to carry around their stuff from class to class, when a child is late they do not have a locker to go to they have to interrupt an ongoing class and are not allowed to carry their book bags to other classes they were given excessive homework but not anymore

In addition I would like to add the case of the young child who committed suicide in Dekalb County schools to my complaint the school system totally ignored his mothers complaints that he was mistreated and they are ignoring my complaints the administrator has discounted my complaints and have not taken them seriously I know my child is being mistreated.  I am making a complaint against the whole school system for its failure to ignore the complaints of poor black children and their parents This is a class complaint and you should not allow any more children to be stunted and destroyed by this school system

This is my second attempt to file this complaint so I have several addends.

During the week of October 20, 2009 my daughter was in class and her white teacher told her to get up and move to another table and gave her an assigned seat, no other children in the class according to her have assigned seats.  My daughter says the children come in and sit where they want to sit.  I asked her had she been given some sort of warning ie. stop talking you have a behavior problem and she said no. The teacher instructed the child to go and sit with the boys this is clearly a gender based method of punishment and gender discrimination.

At the beginning of October the math teacher gave children who had missed problems on their math silent lunch.  This is not age appropriate as well as discriminates against children for the disability of not getting the problems correct.

The Social Studies teacher as opposed to using the county curriculum makes up her own tests and attaches half of the county’s mandated test to the whole test.  This discriminates based on age.  The test has 30 words or more for so far 12-15 boxes.  This is clearly not a well thought out test based upon the developmental and educational needs of fourth graders.

Instead of class work the children are required to take notes like college students.  This is clearly not age appropriate.

There are no county wide curriculum materials and requirements in place to assure that every child across the county has a comparable education.  Some teachers are making homemade tests that are awful and some are making tests that are grand, unfortunately my child has the bad test maker.

There is wide spread test manipulation and cheating in the county which makes it impossible to measure and benchmark correctly the achievements of  children.  This is evidenced by the arrest of several principals in a cheating scandal early this summer.  No one knows for sure who’s cheating and who the cheating is benefiting.  This is discrimination on several fronts based on who the beneficiaries of cheating are.

The school is being used to host activities that are marketed to students that are not accessible because of lack of income ie chess is almost two hundred dollars and drama was well over two hundred dollars these are clearly discriminatory actions  based on income and therefore race because certain races have less income and can not afford the price of entry.

Forgot to mention one teacher staples different versions of the test together like teachers may have an option of giving test b or test a she will staple half of test a to half of test b this is not what the test maker intended and not age appropriate and discriminates on age hampering the children’s ability to learn

7. Your complaint must be filed within 180 days of the discriminatory action

When did the last act of discrimination occur?

Enter the date: 11/22/09 (mm/dd/yyyy)

Are you requesting a waiver of the 180-day filing time limit for discrimination that occurred more than 180 days before the filing of this complaint?

No.

8. What would you like the institution to do as a result of your complaint – what remedy are you seeking?

In would like the county to research how many children who entered evansdale elementary school as honors students ended up receiving c’s and had test scores that went down significantly I would like to know the race, gender and the income of these children.  If a pattern of not achieving is shown because of this schools attitude I would like the county to make changed where all children have the right to a magnet education of a foreign language.

I would like to see the teachers better educated in the psychological and developmental needs of children

I would like to see some consistency regarding curriculum across the county.  My child attended a magnet before and they did use the textbooks and testing materials of the county.

Do you have written information that you think will help us understand your complaint?

Yes

Fuck Off

In Afrian American Twitters, African American Bloggers, African American Blogs, Atlanta, ethnic twitters, family, female blogger, female bloggers, relationships, Sex on November 29, 2009 at 2:56 pm

Afterword

You know I really love you and I’ve been extremely depressed because we have not been able to maintain and keep contact.  I know or I think you are only doing what I asked you to do but sometimes I have to honestly say I think the barely existent us is a joke, i’d like to know if it’s always been a joke or did it just happen to be one this time.  You are doing what I asked you to do and I am extremely proud of you but I can’t help but say I’ve been extremely depressed since we made that decision.  Anyway if we never never never meet again, firdt we met at the Atlanta Fulton Library, then met up again at the Jazz Festival this May I’d like to say whether it was a joke or not I love you, I love you, I love you I’ve never met a man like you,

BUT

But,  as I got to thinking about my past life it hit me that men and women sometimes don’t see things the same way I may be passionately in love with you when you touch me, when you hold me i feel things that I’ve never felt before but I cant make you love me and I suppose that’s the strange thing about passion and love sometimes one can feel it and the other can’t and sometimes I ask God Why and How can my body explode from the tips of my toenails to the top of my head and the other person feels nothing.

I mean nothing or they only feel it until their orgasm is over.  I don’t know my love but I love you and I have loved you passionately for years but I’m over it the passion has turned to blah and what made me change was the thought of the following experience:

The Story and I Mean the Story

I met Mr. Blank in November the thing that struck me about him was that he was really honest, sincere, tall, and decent looking.  I also did not have a car at the time and he seemed willing to let me use his car when I needed.  His laid back attitude towards life was just awesome and he happened to be well off he told me he used to be a millionaire and would be again and I’m sure he is back on his feet again by now.

While the sex with him was not great he was hung up on technique and I am incredibly turned on by intelligence and he was sort of dense in terms of politics world affairs, the economy etc.  and was extremely narcissistic.    His other qualities made me set the goal of doing one thing pleasing him, squeeze I would say to my self as we made love, move I would say to myself as we had sex at that time I felt my skill as a lover was directly related to keeping him and i was rewarded by lets have sex before our date, then after day after day for several months.  As the months progressed I began to notice everything that was in his life was a woman and done by a woman, a young women and it began to slightly irritate me to the point where I was sick of trying to work with sex to keep him.

Well one night or early morning he hears a knock on the door at about three am.  I hear loud noises a woman crying saying I love you I love you and all he’s saying is get out.  I’m like thinking I can’t believe this.  He comes back in the bedroom says something and its like nothing happened and I mean nothing happened.

We have sex wake up the next morning and its the same drill but slowly I start noticing things a brush, and the biggest thing was oil in  the bathroom like oils you might buy from a vendor in big bottles, I look up and notice burnt candles on the bureau and I know that’s not right.  It ends rather blandly he buys me some yogurt from the store its bad and all I say to him is this is awful he starts to quiver and shake and I’m like oh my God I feel like the ex-wife he told me about he’s literally groveling.   It ends with a rather fierce fight on the phone I have to tell a relative of his a secret  because he has to have someone to talk to and watch out for him.  He finds out and tells me you’ll never get any of this dick again and I’m like OK fine.

In any event I say this to say that earlier this week as I ruminated on how madly in love I was with another human being.  Oh how passionately so passionate that my stomach hurt, that I cried every moment that I could.  I thought about the relationship I had with the man above and how this woman was knocking on the door saying I love You I love and he was literally throwing her out and fucking me without giving her a second thought.  I thought Girl you have to stop this man is not calling you that much, only calling when you call back and never initiating a call after the CONVERSATION.  He cares nothing for you, for your stomach to continue to hurt like this and for you to continue to be passionately in love with someone who’s probably fucking six other women is ridiculous.  Needles to say after thinking about this the affair I was having with myself was  literally over.  I still think that he’s fabulously intelligent, fabulously endowed, fabulously mannerable and we have mad things in common but it does not seem to be happening.  I’ll hang around a little longer because something is telling me to but my stomachs not hurting anymore. Maybe it was just a moment a sweet moment:

If You Are Black Get Back or Just Kick Us (sotomayor)

In Afrian American Twitters, African American Bloggers, African American Blogs, african american twitters, Atlanta, barack obama, black blogger, black bloggers, black twitters, Black Women Bloggers, democrats, female blogger, female bloggers, Georgia, politics, Race, Race and Class, the supreme court on July 16, 2009 at 8:32 am

WEB Dubois went to the grave lamenting the compromises, the shucks and the jives and the betrayal of Booker T. Washington to Black America.  WEB Dubois attributed the long journey from slavery to  several years of equality and freedom back to inequality and the Jim Crowe Era to Booker T. Washington. According to C. Vann Woodward as blacks left slavery they began to walk hand and hand with white men and shared a vision of equal pay for equal work and then came along Jim Crow ie. separate but equal.

As we look at the confirmation of Sonia Sotomayor one can not help but parallel Obama’s decision to nominate Sotomayerr with Booker T. Washington’s decision to advocate for separate but equal like Washington did in the Atlanta Speech.  Obama’s decision to nominate Sotomayor can only hurt African Americans even if she was nominated by a black president. Sotomayor has a record of ruling against blacks who have been patently and overtly discriminated against.  While the case of the white firefighters who she ruled against took center stage.  The case of African Americans with obvious slights and who had been overtly discriminated against has been ignored by the media, and the all white senate.  One could only wonder if Sotomayor gets an award and Kudos for ruling against black folks.  As the beat goes again as In the Clarence Thomas case a persons race trumps the content of their character when they have shown a true contradiction of what the democratic party and frankly the constitution stands for.

Sotomayor has either shown an inability to use her wisdom to come to a just solution for people discriminated against in the following place or she is just plain hates black individuals.

Before we review one of  the cases Sotomayor overtly ruled against black people let’s review a discrimination case she ruled for and struck down a lower court decision to throw out.

While eating lunch Yvette Cruz was the recipient of a lewd remark from a fellow coworker on the same level or below her paygrade, in response to the lewd remark she smacked the coworker and they ended up on the floor brawling fighting and rolling around on the floor.  Coach pocketbook fired booth employees.  In response Yvette Cruz sued them for sexual discrimination, and a hostile work environment.  A lower court said that the allegations were vague and threw it out of court.  Ms. Cruz appealed and Sotomayor said her charges were legitimate and ruled in her favor.

Now we can discuss the African Americans, in one  case involving blacks and Sotomayor, a black couple decided to go on a vacation they purchased advanced airline tickets weeks in ahead to go on their vacation.  While boarding they were offered some incentive to give up their tickets because the plane was overbooked, they were on vacation and wanted to quickly get to their destination so they declined the offer.  They ended up being the only black couple on the plane.  The stewardess walked down the aisle looking at individuals and told the black couple  to get off of the plane. They calmy walked off the plane.  because the plane was overbooked even though other people on the plane had purchased standby tickets and same day tickets.  The couple sued, a lower court ruled in their favor, American Airlines appealed and Sotomayor overturned the decision and told them to go file a a federal complaint their suit was not legitimate.

None of these contradictions have come up as  far as I know.  Sonia Sotomayor gets a pass and a nod for discriminating against black people.  Now that Barack oBama is on Air Force One he probably has forgotten how it feels to ride on a regular plane and its alright to abuse blacks since it will never be him.

Atlanta Ladies Do Not Take A Date Here

In African American Bloggers, African American Blogs, Atlanta, black blogger, black bloggers, Black Women Bloggers, borowing, borrowing, celebrities, College Educated, entertainment, family, fashion, female blogger, female bloggers, Georgia, Neighborhoods, relationships on February 26, 2009 at 9:40 am

You know I had a favorite spot that I liked to go.  I liked to go there so much that when my black professional  group decided to change venues to a predominately white meeting place instead of going next door I canceled my membership.  The thing that I liked so much about this place was that it seemed to be like a movie set.

However, after taking a date to Club Circa I decided that the whole I-20 corridor is not date friendly.  I have written previously about taking a friend, a strong friend  to a restaurant in Conyers and having the waitress ask him, my close to four hundred pound friend lick the hot sauce off her arm.  Ladies, just because he’s with me this does not mean he is rich or has a big penis.  He may just be my friend.  I was slightly amused by the incident because he was not my boyfriend and not my love interest but it made me strongly concerned about the families in the Conyers area that were exchanging black wives for white wives considering this woman was white.   In any event I don’t know what happened between them, I encouraged him to go back  another time because he wanted  me to help him shop for presents for his toddler son in North Dakota.  It should be noted however that he had already asked me to marry him, move in with him, do whatever it took just to be special to me.  This would have never happened considering I had a friend years ago who dated him and loved him.  He’s extremely charismatic and a phenomenal friend.   If I need something even though I have not spoken to him in a year he’ll come through.

In any event I have never had much of a problem meeting men when I just walk out of the door , single eligible men.  To just give you an example of my past  I have met one Grammy award nominee in the grocery store.  I met a physical therapist in the grocery store.  I met someone who opened for an act that has won five grammys at Georgia State University, and I know one man who writes and performs for grammy and award winning acts all around the world who I met at Barnes and Noble in Buckhead who used to call me from London and Paris and other places every night.  The truth is I was not interested in any of the people I have mentioned except maybe the guy who called from London and Paris and he was too impatient meaning when he was in town I had to be ready to make a move immediately, as well as some other reasons that made him turn into just a plain rat.  In any event I have never looked for just a man, but a man that I liked and was compatible with.

The men I usually ended up dating in the past and liked very much were usually visual artists, or writers, or maybe a persistent engineer.  I just want to say that the particular engineer that built bridges that I met was the best.  I could say I want and he would not just bring me one he’d bring me thirty- phenomenal.  The one incident that I think defined me and let me know that I had it was when my friends in college dragged me to a fraternity party because the man I liked/loved who was supposed to be coming from D.C. did not show up and I was dragged to this Frat party.  I am not a dancer, except in the dark because I am extremely shy.  So when one of the frat guys jumped into my lap and said either you came here to dance or to fuck , if not get out. I left and so did every other woman in the place.  I always chuckle when I think about this incident.

In regards to men I would also like to add that the majority of men that have come up to me and I have dated extensively have been well endowed.  It was not until the end of my marriage while in my thirties  and I got back into the dating scene that I actually knew that the statement  all black men are well endowed was just a plain out myth and a lie.     I have never had much of a problem attracting a man, if any man would do I suppose I would have one.

In order to find the right man, I turned to the personal ads of craigslist.  I was looking for an intelligent man in the least, a person that I could hold a conversation with.  I was not looking for someone with the characteristics of my former husband a 6’2 dead ringer for Rick Fox who was extremely intelligent and profoundly gifted who produced our daughter who is a dead ringer for an Asian looking Hallie Berry.  And where do I fit into this star studded continuum, one night as I was leaving a political meeting at Manuel’s Tavern a man screamed out of the car Chaka as in Chaka Khan.  My mother told me that I should not be flattered because this meant he was calling me fat.  Oh Well!  In any event I turned to craigslist to find someone to talk to and possibly probably have a long term relationship with.

I went out on the first date with a man I knew I was just not interested in nor even for a friend, we went to Chilis in Lithonia and the waitress went into a long story about only getting paid a certain amount  an hour and how she had no one to take her out.  I watched as she flirted with my date the whole night and  I thought just in character, I think on my next date I’ll go to Atlanta and my date ended with him saying maybe we should have gone to Midtown.  I was not interested in this first date and it ended with her giving him a check that had come and see me again in quotations.  This basically characterizes the black Atlanta dating scene whether it’s date night for marrieds or date night for singles.  This is why I think Forbes rated Atlanta as one of the best places for singles because it’s so predatory and the advantage is for men.  The caveat is I have fielded stares and glances from men who were with other women, while taking my family out to a birthday celebration one man sat and stared at me until I left and his date probably wife was evidently oblivious to what was going on or did not care as long as she could keep purchasing her LV pocketbooks.  I suppose the women that I have had the misfortune to run into with a lot of exceptions may have winked and managed to get him his number, but that’s not me.   Since I have not begun to tell my Circa story I would like to add that I was sitting beside a man at Cafe Circa who was tall and good looking that I could have been extremely interested in but he had a date and I had a date so I tried not to look at him.  Maybe if I change my personality in my next life I’ll slip my phone number to him. As the date I was with is fond of explaining about parallel universes and the time continuum maybe this is what I did in a parallel universe slipped my phone number to him and experienced the pleasure of his extreme good looks and long body.

Anyway I’ve written so much backgrond to get into this story at Circa I’m sick of writing.  Circa is a place that I stumbled upon, for some reason the coffee shop that my professional group was meeting at was now consistently closed at the time we were supposed to meet there.  I think it was someone’s comment about her green or burgundy hair that shut us out of that venue, but she refused to open for us anymore.  I did manage to catch her open the first time I came to the meeting and in attendance was the African contingency of professionals who were lots of  fun to be around, the Ethiopians, Somalis and some others nice……… In any event at the next meeting the proprietor had shut the place down and we had to find another place to meet which ended up being next door but in the midst of Atlanta off of Auburn Avenue where the King home was located had the feeling of skinhead heaven.  We managed to meet at this locale despite the fact that the staff kept throwing us glances like they hated us and did not want our money because we were black.  Unfortunately at the next meeting the coffeehouse women did not show up  so we went to Cafe Circa two doors down and had a wonderful time.  I thought Circa was a great place.  I told my friends and family about it .

So I naturally assumed that Cafe Circa would be a great place to bring a date, a craigslist date that I liked that I talked to for ninety minutes at a time. I also assumed that it was safe because my dear single  friend who I think is one of the most honorable and greatest men I have ever met had recently given a private party there that I could not attend due to illness so I naturally assumed that this place would be a place where the wait staff knew how to act, some of the things that happened I am not going to get into because it seems so strange and surreal, like the singer singing Tyrone by Erykah Badu and when my date could not hear me he texted something on his phone and passed the phone to me and she started singing don’t even have no phone, have to use my phone to text.  At the time I thought the singer was irritated because we were not giving her all of our attention but when I got home and thought about it I was really offended.

In any event I have not gotten to the good part yet.  The waitress came and took our order.  My date orderedtwo drinks and water.  I ordered one Peach Martini.  The waitress came back and put each one of his three drinks on a coaster, meaning three drinks and three straws, for my one little drink I did not get a coaster or a straw.  The waitress then preceded to lay and rub on my date all night long and glare at me from the corner.  I noticed this because my date was asking me not to button up my sweater  so he could look down my cleavage and I jokingly said yeah I saw a psychologist on TV and she had a big necklace on in her cleavage which indicated to me that we were supposed to be looking at her cleavage and nothing else. I pointed to my cleavage and jokingly said you’re supposed to be looking at my cleavage and nothing else, as I looked up the waitress was staring straight down my throat.  It made me feel rather strange.  Suddenly she came up and jerked my plate off of the table and I was quite shocked.

I honestly did not think anything of it, until I went out with my date that I like very much the next night to the Real Chow Baby at the Galleria – excellent staff , my craigslist date commented on the trendiness of the staff and their attire.  He thought one waitress had a mohawk but I explained to him she had a really great perm.  She was cute, young, and free and that’s just how you should be at twenty- something not trying to glare someone down for being on a date.  The Real Chow baby was a totally different atmosphere, I know it’s more general audience oriented  but Christ even at a lounge the waitress should not be feeling and rubbing your date up unless they are looking for johns.  In any event we went to cafe Intermezzo in Dunwoody after the Real Chow Baby where I found out the date had given the waitress at Cafe Circa a 25% tip.  I think I could have swallowed twenty because I give twenty to most people even if the service is not great but twenty-five percent was a little hard to swallow, I’ve even been out with 50 and hundred dollar tippers but the waiter or waitress respected me and my date.  I was taken aback and offended that I could be treated so shabbily and my date preceded to give the woman a twenty-five percent tip. I was mad at him and this revelation made me really think that Cafe Circa does offer the services of women of questionable character, I know my date paid for a back rub and to get laid on.  Ladies if your married man tells you he’s going to Circa for business I would question if it’s monkey business compliments of the wait staff.

Finally I would like to say Cafe Intermezzo in Dunwoody was wonderful as usual.  It’s been a great date spot for years.  I have an affinity for Dunwoody, when I temped, the temp agencies in Dunwoody always made sure that I had a job and was working.  When I was in an executive training program and all of the participants had MBA’s Dunwoody still found a place for me in this program.  Dunwoody is a good place as well as my family has had other financial and banking needs that the 20 corrider could not take care of and the Galleria area  where The Real Chow Baby is located came through.  I suppose I say all of this to say that if I take the time to put an ad in craigslist.  I should take the time to suggest places to my date that exemplify the character and the values that I try to practice in real life.

The twenty corridor is not doing it for me and ladies Circa Cafe is an absolutely horrible place to take someone you like and cherish to.  I am trying to salvage even a friendship out of this craigslist person that I loved talking to but the shadow of a 25% tip when I could not get a coaster or a straw and had my plate jerked from under me is making me feel that my date just did not respect me as much as he should, he says he did not know.  We talk everyday for at least two hours but I’m still wondering about him. 🙂

Falsely accused of Shoplifting Alert: Protect Yourself

In African American Bloggers, African American Blogs, AIDS, Atlanta, black blogger, black bloggers, Black Women Bloggers, politics, The Economy on January 13, 2009 at 9:45 am

As many of you may be aware of I was falsely accused of shoplifting at  Vision Works at Stonecrest  Mall in Lithonia Georgia  and accused and taken to jail for disorderly conduct instead.  If you want proof you can view what I was taken into custody for at http://drop.io/falseaccusation . In addition I will be uploading other articles related to the subject as time permits.

In any event I had to write this post today because as I’m doing research on the issue I became afraid not just for myself but for everyone who walks into a shopping mall, place of business, or retail establishment.  I am certainly afraid for folks to go to the mall that I went to.  In this harsh economic environment one should ask themselves if they can afford the  loss of reputation and the innuendo that can be garnered from a false and  malicious accusation that can linger with you even if you have not done anything wrong.  One should seriously weigh this issue before entering a retail establishment.  The facts are in this climate shopkeepers can utter any amount of lies about you they choose to.    The facts are also in that you don’t know who’s behind the counter and what their morals and values are.  There are actually immoral people working as shopkeepers, police officers, and security guards who will tell lies just for fun and entertainment or just because they don’t like the way you look.

If you have places where you have shopped for years without incident and others have too.  It  is probably wise to stick to areas like this but if people are whispering about a location and it’s treatment of individuals is questionable, it’s probably wise to stay away from there especially if you have an employer, are young and have a future or just have dreams and aspirations.  Furthermore the emotional toll and stress of being falsely accused and harassed is not worth it.  Finally the parents of Teenagers should keep their children away from establishments that have a history and record of doing bad things.

While loss of reputation is something that most people can live with, the loss of life is something that no one can live with because they are dead.  As I’ve been researching the issue of the falsely accused.  I’ve come across disturbing incidents involving the not guilty and the guilty that have resulted in individuals being beaten to death in the back rooms of stores and malls, people being shot in the parking lot, and many deaths related to individuals being wrongfully and rightfully accused of shoplifting.  I suppose if a person is a shoplifter they should go to the backroom and try to work it out  but if you are minding your own business, have never ever been accused of stealing or shoplifting in your life, have never been convicted of a felony, and only convicted of misdemeanors related to traffic tickets like me you should really hesitate before you go into any back room with anyone or even leave the spot you are in, judging from what I’ve read and what’s been on the news lately in terms of officers shooting people in the back, and just plain killing people without cause.  “DO NOT GO INTO A BACK ROOM IF YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING WRONG AND FEEL THAT YOU ARE BEING MALICIOUSLY TARGETED YOU MAY NOT GET OUT OF THE ROOM ALIVE.”

As for honestly what to do I don’t know, in my case I told the security guard I did not want to get out of the car but he insisted.

I am wondering if trying to call an attorney is even possible when falsely accused in a retail establishment.  Isn’t it strange that as citizens of the United States we have rights and can not be detained without cause or proof  but as soon as we step into a retail location evidently by the many cases that I’ve been reading.  Individuals give up their constitutional and Miranda rights when accosted by a Security Guard in a retail establishment.  Illegal search and seizure is against the law but because I was in the parking lot of an establishment the security guard could insist that I get out of the car with a gun attached this hip.

The following are quotes from blogs and other sources discussing the above issues.

The following post is taken from a blog called Civil Rights Watch


Many big-box retail stores have come under fire lately for treating their minority customers in a discriminatory fashion. For instance, Macy’s East was sued by the State of New York for discrimination in the form of racial profiling in its New York stores. On January 14, 2005, Macy’s reached a settlement with the state, agreeing to pay a fine in the amount of $600,000 and to retrain its security forces to avoid racial profiling in the future.

However, next to Dillard’s, Macy’s looks like Jesse Jackson’s Shirts ‘n More. Since 1994, six people have been killed in Dillard’s. Five of them were minorities. The deaths occurred in Houston, San Antonio, Memphis, Arlington (TX), Cleveland and El Paso. None of the victims had weapons. Some were accused of shoplifting; some had the temerity to argue with Dillard’s security officers about unfair treatment and paid with their lives. Two of the victims had, in fact, stolen goods from Dillard’s (one stole a box of sunglasses, the other stole a beard trimmer). Those two people were shot in the parking lot, after having made it out of the store. Though criminal behavior, shoplifting is not a capital crime in the United States and security officers are not empowered to act as judge, jury and executioner. Furthermore, alleged shoplifting does not give the officer-cum-cowboy the right to endanger the lives of all the other people in the mall parking lot as he shoots at his suspect-bad guy.

Dillard’s employs off-duty and retired police officers as its security guards. Because Dillard’s views these officers as independent contractors, the company does not offer them any training or guidelines, they are not monitored and Dillard’s does not conduct any checks into their personal or professional backgrounds. These are the security guards who harass, beat, strip search and kill Dillard’s customers. Dillard’s stands alone as the only major department chain to use off-duty police officers. The company still maintains that using armed off-duty or retired officers for security is the best way to ensure the safety of its shoppers. You be the judge.

The killings that have taken place in Dillard’s stores are too numerous for me to describe in this brief column. However, I would like to elaborate on one of the most spectacular killings, that of Darryl Robinson, of Houston, Texas.

On June 1, 1994, Darryl Robinson went to a Dillard’s in Houston, Texas. Darryl was not suspected of shoplifting. A clerk accused Darryl of demanding $1 million from her and she called in Dillard’s security officers. Other witnesses and family members say Darryl asked for a $50 advance on his Dillard’s credit card. Instead of escorting Darryl out of the store for causing a disturbance, the security officers took him into a back room and beat him. The officers, however, were not finished with Darryl Robinson; after beating him, the officers hog-tied him. The security guards had already handcuffed Darryl’s wrists and his ankles. But that was not restraint enough. The officers bent Darryl in half and linked the wrist and ankle restraints behind his back. He was tied like a hog. Witnesses say an assistant manager was seen riding Darryl like a “bucking bronco” when he was tied up. Darryl died, in the hog-tied position, on a rolling flatbed dolly used to move boxes. There were two possible causes of his death: either Darryl died of a heart attack or of what is called “positional asphyxiation,” meaning he suffocated due to the hog-tying, fear, and the weight of the officers sitting on him.

Minority shoppers at Dillard’s are not always killed, most of the time the complaints come from people who have been harassed and humiliated. The law firm of Chargois & Ernster in Houston represents over 100 plaintiffs across the country who allege they were subjected to discriminatory treatment at Dillard’s stores. For information on the most recent cases, please see this article in HispanicBusiness.com.

Finally, it is apparently as difficult to be an employee of color at Dillard’s as it is to be a shopper. For a class action filed in 1999, Dillard’s reached a $5.6 million settlement on behalf of African-American employees in their Kansas and Missouri stores.

Dillard’s is as dangerous for minorities as Iraq is for, well, everybody. For this, Dillard’s is the reprehensible first recipient of Civil Rights Watch’s first Retail Wil’ Out Award. I urge you to read the full story on the Houston Press about the retail catastrophe that Dillard’s has allowed itself to become.

The blog entry states that two of the killings involved people who actually had shoplifted something.  They state one man stole a box of sunglasses.  This by itself is believable but when you read the following it makes you wonder if items were planted on the individuals once they were dead.

The following is a shoplifitng rendition of a college student who was killed n Nashville and is at rest with the belief that he’s a shoplifter and a thief.  This account is going to be a lot skewed because it’s coming from the police department.  If you read my ticke at http://drop.io/falseaccusation . You will find the officer used words to skew the ticket instead of  just stating the facts, he made statements that can never be proven.

Metro Nashville Police Department
* Media Releases

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
September 29 , 2006

The shoplifting suspect shot during a scuffle with a Tennessee State Trooper in the parking lot of Hickory Hollow Mall Thursday night is identified as a 21-year-old Tennessee State University student from Las Vegas, Nevada. Efforts are continuing to locate his next of kin in Nevada. He is in critical condition at Vanderbilt University Medical Center.

Trooper Aussie Thaxter, 41, who fired his state-issued gun one time, was treated at Vanderbilt for injuries sustained when he was dragged by the suspect’s car. He was released during the night.

Thaxter was working an off-duty security job at Dillard’s department store in a THP utility uniform when he was notified by an employee of a suspiciously acting man in the men’s department who was carrying several designer shirts and said he would be paying for them in another area of the store. While in Thaxter’s view, the man fled from the store to the parking lot carrying the shirts. Thaxter gave chase and ordered him to stop.

The man got into a Plymouth Breeze sedan that was backed into a handicapped parking space. As the suspect started the motor, Thaxter reached into the car through the open door in an effort to turn off the ignition. He was unsuccessful and the suspect put the car in gear and began to pull away with Thaxter still partly inside. Thaxter was dragged for about 20 yards before he managed to fire a shot. The suspect was hit in the neck and Thaxter fell to the pavement. The Plymouth continued on, entered a bank parking lot and came to rest against the bank building. A Metro officer who was in the mall was told of the commotion and rushed to the bank parking lot. He immediately radioed for an ambulance.

The investigation into the shooting is being headed by the Metro Police Department’s Homicide Unit. The THP’s Criminal Investigation Division, the TBI and an investigator from the District Attorney’s Office are assisting. The full investigative report will be forwarded to District Attorney General Torry Johnson for review when it is complete.

###

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The above incident is about a supposedly guilty shoplifter who did not live to tell the story.  However I was falsely accused of stealing.  I went to jail for disorderly conduct.  I was stripped down, I had to put on a smelly orange jump suit and was being watched every second by an attendant.  Not only did I pull all of my clothes off and put on others.  I was given a drug test, an AIDS test and had to give urine, and  finger printed.  I had to leave my car on the mall grounds.   Furthermore I had to give up my pocket book and everything in it had to be checked into the police locker.  I was stripped of everything. Finally I was released on my signature because I did not have a criminal history what so ever.

I say all of this to say that the circumstances surrounding the dead college student above are eerily similar to mine.  I was approached and accused of shoplifting while in my car, my keys were in the ignition and I was about to leave the premises.   The security guard was at my window what if I would have tried to just leave, though I could not because I was blocked in by a truck.  Would I have been shot and had a box of sunglasses planted in my car since it was a vision care place I went to and forever known as a shoplifter.

The parking lot killings are too similar I am wondering if anyone accused of  shoplifting and shot in a parking lot while in their car is guilty.   It’s too convenient.  In the first  quoted blog entry it’s stated that a man had a box of sunglasses and was shot in the parking lot with a “whole” box of sunglasses.  It’s beginning to look like people target individuals to kill and plant items on them after they reach their cars because one can not plant multiple items on a dead body in the middle of a store but someones car is definitely a good place to plant items.

Farmington Daily Times Nichols� sense of ‘mission� obscured by senseless shootings

In Atlanta, Brian Nichols, drug use, Race, Race and Class on March 28, 2005 at 8:14 pm

Farmington Daily Times Nichols� sense of ‘mission� obscured by senseless shootings: “DeWayneWickham(AT)aol.com.”

AUDIO AND VIDEO OF NICHOLS CAPTURE

In Atlanta, Brian Nichols, Class, Meet the Press, Race and Class, The Economy on March 28, 2005 at 7:49 am

Jackson’s Junction: Exclusive: Gwinnett Police Radio-Nichols Capture

The Editor’s Blog: Death to Brian Nichols? I say no

In Atlanta, Brian Nichols, Crime on March 28, 2005 at 6:04 am

The Editor’s Blog: Death to Brian Nichols? I say no